I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
