Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
