That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Your tits are I can't wait for
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
Randomize
