I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Randomize