So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
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They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
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You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
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