sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
