i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I need a burrito and a hug.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
