some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize