I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
