sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize