You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
