one two three fourrrrnication!
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize