Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
he told me I talked like a deaf person
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
