Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
