he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.