I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!