I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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