just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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