there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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