Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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