Non-Jews are for practice
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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