I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
