is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
