Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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