is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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