Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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