Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
My ass is underappreciated
Randomize
