By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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