Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
We are all done wearing pants today
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
