Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
