What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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