Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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