This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
