The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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