JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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