i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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