Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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