so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
