why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
