Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Randomize
