worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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