He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
So many bounce houses so little time
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
i would one night stand the shit outta him
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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