I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Randomize
