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• (208): View more from Idaho

  i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?

  (410): View more from Maryland

  The recession has changed everything man.

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• (719): View more from Colorado

  I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.

  (1-419): View more from Ohio

  I'm out of town so we should be golden.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight

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• (435): View more from Utah

  I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!

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• (312): View more from Illinois

  My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.

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• (574): View more from Indiana

  I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (716): View more from New York

  Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..

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• (320): View more from Minnesota

  I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night

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• (310): View more from California

  So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.

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