he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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