I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
