Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
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