did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Randomize
