We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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