Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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