you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Randomize
