After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
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I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
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You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.