I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
